Celebrating Burns Night

Celebrating Burns Night
Dumfries, Ayr, and Alloway, Scotland.
25th January, 2024.

I have decided to log a retrospective document of the Burns Night I enjoyed, in Ayrshire, two years ago. Because it was pretty special, and worth remembering in prose.

There is something about Burns - or rather something about the ritual of Burns Night - that appeals to me immensely. Perhaps it's that opportunity, post-Navidad, to once again warm the cockles with a toast of neat scotch and a roaring fire?

Across the UK, there are so many Burns Night celebratory evenings, and I had oft pondered on how to celebrate the occasion properly. I'd love to go to one of those Burns Night dances or something. All I'd need is a willing wee lassie and a few friends who... oh yeah. Who'd go to a Burns Night ceilidh with me? How could I enjoy Burns Night on my own? Certainly not by attending one of those evenings on spec, hoping I'd make a few friends on the night. Fat chance of that. I did once walk into a (very) low key celebration in the basement at Milroy's of Soho [IYKYK]. That was 2017 and, if I remember rightly, they were offering something of a deal on a nip of Scotch with some 'haggis bites'. In the daytime I had wandered into John Sandoe books, who were able to furnish me with an edition of the Robert Burns biography by Ian McIntyre. Still got that, and it gets glanced at on the odd occasion.

But how to properly celebrate Burns Night, as a curious loner? That was the question. I started to plot in my head. At first, a random drive up to Inverness seemed like a good idea. But he was the Bard of Ayrshire, so it makes more sense to go there, surely?

That's what I did. On the morning of Thursday 25th January 2024, I got into my Toyota Yaris and drove. Destination Scotland. Flask of tea and a few biccies. The day was typical January. Grey. Overcast.

I was on the outskirts of Dumfries in around 3 hours. Stopped at a small rest area on the A75, slugged some tea, and walked into a mini Greggs outlet. Seem to remember I got a pasty or something, and it hit the spot. Picked up a bottle of Irn-Bru. As I approached Dumfries proper, there were signs for a Robert Burns house, which took me by surprise. I had not known about the Dumfries connection, but what good fortune that I was passing through. Parked up in Dumfries town centre and walked over to the Burns house; a stone-built establishment on Burns Street. This was the house where Burns worked once he had 'made it', and he also died there. Usual score: you can walk around the rooms at free will, and there's a gift shop at the end. My cup of tea. Purchased a whisky glass with an effigy of Burns etched into it. A five minute walk up the road is to be found the Burns mausoleum, in the grounds of St Michael's and South Parish Church. And it's quite something - a white marble centrepiece of the yard, worthy of one of Liverpool's top-ranking gangsters.

Finally, there was time to walk across the footbridge, crossing at the River Nith, where, on the other side, there is to be found a 'Burns centre,' with some interesting exhibitions.

Driving north of Dumfries, one suddenly feels a change in landscape. Gone are the dual carriageways, and the roads turn rural and bendy. As a rule, I don't enjoy driving these sorts of roads,. but they were quiet stretches on the whole. Time to actually enjoy the Scottish countryside. I drove by forest streams, and the odd lofty mansion in the middle of nowhere. So typical of Scotland.

Another ninety minutes or so before I reached Alloway; parking straight up at the Burns Cottage, because time was going on, and I was conscious that the attraction would be closing in an hour or two. Fetched a ticket from the kiosk, and headed over. The Burns cottage itself is very 18th century, pre industrial revolution. The guide who greeted me was a laid back but very amiable man; pleased to see someone who had driven up from (near) Liverpool. In appearance and demeanor he reminded me much of Billy Connolly, who is a lifestyle hero of mine. He walked me through most of the rooms (which are all on one level) through to the last room, before having to attend to the next little group.

Once the cottage has been seen, there is the Robert Burns Birthplace Museum, which I guess is the 'official' centre of Robert Burns, where all the modern-day research and academia takes place. Remembering back now, I was able to catch a packet of crisps at the cafe, though it was late afternoon by this time. Bought a miniature bottle of Robert Burns-branded Scotch whisky from the gift shop. I am usually a bit suspicious of this type of branding, but the occasion became it.

Next it was time to have a look at the other Burns-related features of Alloway, namely the Auld Kirk, Burns memorial gardens, and the-one-and-only Brig O' Doon, which is a small pebbled bridge that crosses the River Doon.

Out of Alloway and into the centre of Ayr, where I was staying over the night.

My lodge for the evening was the Lochinver Guesthouse. From the outside, quite an unassuming property, in a quiet but leafy terrace. Built in that typical Scottish granite which one sees everywhere in Edinburgh. The inside took my breath away. A beautifully decorated hallway, plush was not the word. Looking left, a grand piano was peeping aside the solid ajar door of the large front room. My bedroom was on the top floor if I recall, where I was greeted with a small glass bottle of fresh milk, and a jar of cookies. I ate one of the cookies and thought they were absolutely delicious.

I can't remember why, but I had a stroll along Ayr beach just before it got dark, walking past a interesting segment of an old castle. [Greenan castle - it was probably on Trip Advisor's list of things to see in Ayr.]

Of course, no Burns night would be complete without a Burns supper. I thought I might try the Tam O'Shanter Inn on the high street, but, from memory, I think the restaurant section wasn't open (maybe with it being a Thursday). Instead, I ventured into the Ayrshire and Galloway hotel bistro, a bit further down the high street, where their restaurant was sparsely populated. They were, unfortunately, out of the full ingredients of a traditional 'haggis neeps and tatties'. But nil desperandum, because they could offer a slight variation on the dish: deep fried haggis to start, followed by a haggis-filled chicken dish with veg and a cream sauce.

And what better way to end this wild night out than with a deep-fried Mars Bar at Blue Lagoon Fish and Chips? I had never tried one before, but was gagging to do so. Absolutely loved it. Not the horrible greasy dish I had imagined, it was actually much more nuanced than that - could have easily eaten two.

Back to the hotel and, in bed, I had the Robert Burns whisky miniature at the bedside table, the Robert Burns whisky glass from Dumfries, an episode of Happy Valley (which I was catching up on at the time) on iPlayer, and no doubt a selection of other sugary snacks on the go. It was the best Burns Night I have ever had and, to be perfectly frank, I think it's the best Burns Night anybody has ever had. Thus confirming my Scots mantra, which I've just invented now: ah dunnae need nay lassie, ta savour ah dram and tattie. [Thank you, I'm here till Thursday.]

On checking out of the Lochinver Guesthouse the next day, I enquired if the cookies were locally made? No, he said, they're actually from Lidl! [Their Deluxe range All Butter Sultana cookies - highly recommended]. Great news, as I am now able to relive that taste for as long as they remain an active product at the aforementioned supermarket.

As for tonight? Well, BBC Four is not offering much in the way of Burns Night broadcasting like previous years. I am doing dry January, so no whisky in the jar. However, BBC Four are putting on a 90th birthday celebration of the Scottish Symphony Orchestra. 7-9pm. I could do a lot worse than watching that.